Grown Ups
Grown Ups

[from trailer]
Roxanne Chase-Feder: [an old woman approaches them] And this must be your mother.
Rob Hilliard: My wife.
Roxanne Chase-Feder: I'm sorry!
Rob Hilliard: I'm not.
[kisses his wife]
Marcus Higgins: [onlooking] Oh, grody.

Get Smart
Get Smart

[Max is using the toilet and listening in on two henchmen conversing by the sinks. He flushes the toilet and walks over to them]
Maxwell Smart: You know what? I will tell you, I love your country! No more communism, no rules of any kind, really. I'm filling my suitcase with steroids and art from ancient Mesopotamia, ran over an old woman yesterday, best vacation I ever had!


[an alarm on his watch goes off]
Maxwell Smart: Time to take my pill...
[leaves and returns to his and 99's table]
Maxwell Smart: There was a guy in the bathroom who's really hot.
[beat]
Agent 99: Okay, well...
Maxwell Smart: No, no, no, radioactive hot. Although, yes, he did have a

certain rugged quality that some found appealing.

Get Smart
Get Smart

Maxwell Smart: [to two Russian suspects] You know what? I will tell you, I love your country. No more communism, no rules of any kind, really. I'm filling my suitcase with steroids and art from ancient Mesopotamia, ran over an old woman yesterday, best vacation I ever had!

Sunset Blvd.
Sunset Blvd.

Joe Gillis (as narrator): It was a great big white elephant of a place. The kind crazy movie people built in the crazy 20s. A neglected house gets an unhappy look. This one had it in spades. It was like that old woman in "Great Expectations". That Miss Havisham in her rotting wedding dress and her torn veil, taking it out on the world, because she'd been given the go-by.

EuroTrip
EuroTrip

[Scott and Mieke are having sex in the Priest's Confessional Booth when The Old Woman in Confessional enters the booth]
Old Woman in Confessional: Forgive me Father for I have sinned. I have cheated on my husband. Do you think God will ever forgive me?
Scott Thomas: Oh yes!
Old Woman in Confessional: Father?
[the Old

Woman in Confessional sees Mieke's butt on the screen]
Old Woman in Confessional: Father!
Old Woman in Confessional: [the Old Woman in Confessional runs out of the booth screaming and crossing herself]

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Mac: What do we need a mattress for?
Dennis Reynolds: What do you mean what do we need a mattress for? Why in the hell do you think we just spent all that money on a boat? The whole purpose of buying the boat in the first place was to get the ladies nice and tipsy topside so we can take 'em to a nice comfortable place below deck and, you know, they can't

refuse, because of the implication.
Mac: Oh, uh... okay. You had me going there for the first part. The second half kinda threw me.
Dennis Reynolds: Well, dude, dude, think about it. She's out in the middle of nowhere with some dude she barely knows. You know, she looks around and what does she see? Nothin' but open ocean. "Ahh, there's nowhere for

me to run! What am I gonna do, say no?"
Mac: Okay. That... that seems really dark.
Dennis Reynolds: Nah, no, it's not dark. You're misunderstanding me, bro.
Mac: I'm-I think I am.
Dennis Reynolds: Yeah, you are, because if the girl said no then the answer obviously is no...
Mac:

No. Right.
Dennis Reynolds: But the thing is she's not gonna say no; she would never say no because of the implication.
Mac: ...Now, you've said that word "implication" a couple of times. Wha-what implication?
Dennis Reynolds: The implication that things might go wrong for her if she refuses to sleep with me. Now, not that

things are gonna go wrong for her, but she's thinkin' that they will.
Mac: But it sounds like she doesn't wanna have sex with you...
Dennis Reynolds: Why aren't you understanding this? She-she doesn't know if she wants to have sex with me! That's not the issue...
Mac: Are you gonna hurt women?
Dennis

Reynolds: I'm not gonna hurt these women! Why would I ever hurt these women? I feel like you're not getting this at all!
Mac: I'm not getting it.
Dennis Reynolds: Goddamn.
[notices old woman staring at them]
Dennis Reynolds: Well, don't you look at me like that. You certainly wouldn't be in any danger.

Mac: So they are in danger!
Dennis Reynolds: No one's in any danger!

Waterworld
Waterworld

Helen: Did you see anything out there?
Mariner: See what?
Helen: An end, to all this water?
Mariner: That old woman they buried today? She found the only end there is.

Chocolat
Chocolat

Vianne Rocher: What do you see in it?
Armande Voizin: Not a damned thing.
Vianne Rocher: Come on, it's a game. What do you see?
Armande Voizin: I see a cranky old woman too tired to play games.
Vianne Rocher: Hmm. I've got just the thing for you.

This Is 40
This Is 40

Ronnie: [Referring to Graham Parker video they are viewing] What are you doing?
Cat: I'm contextualizing him as one of the great figures in rock history.
Ronnie: You can't show him in his prime in '77 and then jump straight to him as he is now. It's terrifying. You have to reverse it. You have got to show him as he is now, very

briefly, and then show him in 1977. You have got to Benjamin Button it.
Cat: I don't know what you're talking about. All rock stars are older now. Steven Tyler, David Bowie, Mick Jagger...
Pete: Paul McCartney.
Ronnie: Okay, stop it. Everybody that you are mentioning looks like an old woman now. You're just mentioning a bunch

of Jessica Tandys. Keith Richards gets away with it, but that's because Keith Richards looked 70 when he was 40. And now that he's 70 he looks 69. He's regenerating.

Highlander
Highlander

[after Kurgan rips the top of a car off and throws the driver out]
[looking over at the old woman in the passenger seat with insincere affection]
Kurgan: [smiling] Mom...